So Kara Saun didn't win. I can't say I'm not surprised. I thought she'd take it all the way. Her designs aren't my cup of herbal tea (milk Splenda, please), but she's the golden child of that cast.
Jay, on the other hand, is quite talented and as the judges said in their deliberation, she -- I mean he -- is a true artiste. He lives in a hut in the middle of Pennsylvania with no running water or electricity. He has elves stitch his clothes for him, and his only source of nourishment is some residual tree bark left by M. Nature from the old elm in the back.
Wendy Pepper, on the other hand, is a bitch. I didn't see it until tonight. I always thought she was just hormonal. Now I know she's just whore-moan-al.
For next season, I'd like to see a cast of characters not unlike this year's group. Austin Scarlet O'Hara International Airport was quite a treat. He's, what do the kids say, a faggot. Yes, a faggot. That's it. His designs were nothing short of biblical and neither the judges nor the other contestants knew what to expect from him. Had he been in the final three, I'm sure he would have managed to surprise us all with his luxurious rabbit furr jackets. Only the rabbits would still be alive. Oh, how La Boeheme of him. I mean her.
I hope Wendy Pepper opens her store in Virginiasburg Lake, Virginia. She should remain in the design industry, though perhaps not in fashion. I think a signature line of Wendy Pepper swastika armbands would be pretty. Toss the traditional red, black and white color scheme for something more autumnal, like blood, bile and vomit.
Until next season -- during which Heidi Klum better be replaced by someone with a heart and upper lip -- we'll have to settle for the normal gay programming on Bravo. Showdog Moms and Dads premieres in March. I can't wait.
Aufweidershnitzelziegheil,
Ben T. Shirt
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